Does anyone understand what it feels like to want to end your own life. ?

I've seen some say it's a selfish act. So, I should remain in pain, be totally miserable for who. For all those family members and friends who call me daily.........ha ha ha. Like they care. If they missed or wanted me they would call, they would want to be with me. Not just on a holiday to say how much they miss and love me. What a crock.At this moment I truly believe no one would miss me. This is not a selfish act. I'm doing a favor for everyone.Does anyone understand this but me?